wonders of love

your love is my strength.
i am renewed when i look into your eyes.
i feel empowered,
loved,
and everything seems possible and attainable.

life is beautiful and magical;
full of wonder.

i dream about what the future holds for us.
i wonder if we'll get old together.
will you still look at me the same way --
as if no one else exists,
and the world has evaporated;
just the two of us remain.

i love you for so many reasons,
and the majority of them are intangible...
they are the things which make you, well you.

dreams, meet reality

i always dreamed of this perfect and pure love which would come into my life at some point...
predestined in a sense i suppose.
i never felt the need to go searching for something i had never felt or experienced,
or worse,
settle for something less than the butterflies and fireworks.
sure i had flings,
but never had i found the real thing to truly pursue.

in retrospect i can't say if it was the right thing or the wrong thing;
all i know is that it was my conviction,
and i believed it to my very core.

i had never met anyone worthy of letting down my shroud of vulnerability.
i guess there is some truth to when they say love comes when you least expect.

here i find myself,
blindsided and tortured by love.
for the first time i feel the magic,
the tingling,
the butterflies,
the fireworks,
the highs,
the lows,
...
it's all a sensory overload.

at the same time i find myself asking,
how many times am i going to find this in my life?
will it be comparable?
should i really put that much emphasis on what others say or think?
at what cost should happiness be attained?
am i ready for this?
will i get sidetracked?
...
my head has been spinning.

i have met someone with whom i connect so deeply.
it may not be what i had envisioned,
but it is that much and more.
he stands for everything i believe in and care about.
he reminds me of my father in oh so many ways.

i can daydream about this so-called perfect life,
but is it ever attainable,
for nothing is truly perfect.
i'm afraid i won't find a truer love...

i'll probably fall in love again,
no doubt,
but one in which both parties involved are so completely enamored with one another,
life,
love,
and the fleeting moments.
who can say?

i want a family.
i want children.
i want someone to love me for me.
i don't want to be blinded by the false and empty shallowness of life.
i want someone to spend the rest of my life with,
laughing,
crying;
someone there with me to experience every moment together.

so when does love triumph all else?
and at what cost?

morning rituals

i awake in the morning to the sound of goats outside my window.
i stumble out of bed and make my way to open the front door and the morning floods into my living room.
i step onto the veranda and i am greeted not just by the morning sun,
but also the sound of children preparing for school
and that of families who have been awake and buzzing for hours.

the goats have now migrated to the front yard.
i turn the radio on and the rhythms of jamaica encourage me to open my eyes.
i go to put on my morning coffee,
open the windows,
and before i know it the strong aroma has filled my house and leaked out into the yard.
as i exit, i come face-to-face with asha hanging in my kitchen window.

every morning it's the same...
she meets me at my kitchen window as she stands on the overhang.
she claims the smell of my coffee beckons her to come check me.
we chat about the morning,
the upcoming events of the day,
the night before,
sometimes about nothing important at all.

she attempts to cajole me into heading to school with her.
she always offers to stay behind and wait for me,
but generally she will say,
'later,'
head to school and expect me when i come.
these morning rituals have become a favorite moment of the day.

if i leave early enough,
i catch all the late stragglers heading to school late to avoid devotion.
if i leave late,
it's just the passing of neighbors and goats,
who are no longer phased as i jump over their tied ropes.
i stop to chat with a few of them and most of the time i lose track of the minutes...
'likkle more' i say and with that,
i'm back on my way;
down the mountain and off to school.

as soon as i reach the school yard,
i'm bombarded with 'maanin' teach, wagwaan miss kouns, arait mi boss, ...'
the infant students run to attack me and climb me like a jungle gym,
as i try to make my way to my grade six class,
and so the day begins and a new lesson unfolds itself...

the complete idiots guide to communicating with spirits, rita berkowitz

exchange is a process of giving and receiving.
just as you give your energy to others, you receive energy from others.
the strongest, most positive, most supportive energy is love.
when love thrives in any of it's multiple dimensions, energy blossoms.
love is the foundation of the universe's energy, and it's power is very real.
when you feel happy and good in the presence of someone else, you're drawing from an energy based in love.
it is this energy base, the energy of love, that heals.
when you feel it, you know it.
it recharges and replenishes you.
it restores your sense of well-being and happiness.
it makes you whole and unites all parts of your being.

'the complete idiots guide to communicating with spirits', rita berkowitz.

moving words from a friend

"i am not sure i ever told you that that afternoon i spoke with you was the first time i communicated so clearly with somebody's spirit and experience. it was something of inexplicable beauty and power for me, and something i wasn't quite sure , until then, was inside me..."

energy

life is a flowing energy.

we can have a great affect on people, life, the world and the universe with the type of energy we transmit.

in all things, be positive and uplifting...

you never know how it could affect you or others around you.

take risks. be bold. be happy.

is it really rewarding to live so safely?? be willing to take risks; for you could be missing out on life. break out of your comfort zones and the assured knowns. lose yourself in the unknown and the less traveled paths. make your own history and break the monotony. live every second as if it is your last. explore every square inch possible. ask every question you have. see all that life has to offer and try to live it, all; every, single moment. don't let others hold you back; instead, encourage them to do the same. it's the simple things in life and in the world we must seize and run with. don't get clouded by people or things around you. see the BIG picture.